Jun 23, 2022
When reformed gunslinger Lemual Roberts (formerly the Deadeye Kid) and his sidekick, British travel writer Clarence Fanshaw, roll into town, things sometimes get a bit... spirited....
But sorting out a feud in Ozark hill country might be more
than
they can handle.
Cast List
Lemuel Roberts /Deadeye Kid - J. Spyder Isaacson
Clarence Fanshaw - J. Hoverson
Sheriff Nell - Hillary Dixon
Bartender - Joel Harvey
DRUMMONDS
Eb Drummond - Dan Conklin
Jake Drummond - Jake Stratton
TARBOXES
Abner Tarbox - Bill Hollweg (of Brokensea Audio)
Hap Tarbox - Reynaud LeBoeuf
Marilee Tarbox - Beverly Poole
Jenfaire Tarbox - Jody Montague
Harmonica music by Jere Canote (Canote.com)
Other Music: Kevin MacLeod (Incompetech.com)
Editing and Sound: Julie Hoverson
Cover Design: Brett Coulstock
Cover Photo: Lauren Burbank (courtesy of Stock Xchange.com)
"What kind of a place is it?
Why it's hill country somewhere in the Old West..."
**********************************************************************
THE DEADEYE KID
Cast:
Olivia
Lemuel Roberts (Deadeye Kid), retired gun, seen it all
Clarence Fanshaw, British writer, highfaluting
Hap Tarbox, last of the Tarboxes
Jake Drummond, last of the Drummonds
Marilee Tarbox, cause of the feud
Jenfaire Tarbox, Marilee's sister
Abner Tarbox, "old man" of the Tarboxes
Eb Drummond, old and more than a might tetched
Barkeep
Sheriff Nell Milford - ex-schoolmarm, talks purty.
OLIVIA Did you have any trouble finding it? What do you mean, what kind of a place is it? Why, it's an Ozark cart-road, can't you tell?
WESTERN MUSIC
AMBIANCE DAYTIME WOODS - BIRDS, ETC.
SOUND HOOF BEATS - TWO HORSES
LEM Tell me again why you wanted to come on up here?
FANSHAW I've told you a dozen times already, old chap.
LEM Keep tellin' me and might could I'll believe it some time.
FANSHAW [chuckle] I am fascinated by the impact of emigrant culture into the Americas. This particular area of the Ozark Mountain Range was heavily influenced by the Scottish who came here over the years.
LEM I never heered no one from hereabouts sounding Scotch.
FANSHAW Not surprising, my good man - Scotch is a whiskey. Scottish is an accent. [chuckles]
LEM [disgusted] I reckon.
FANSHAW And you see, this area is most commonly known for carrying over the Scottish concept of the feud.
LEM Well, I guess I did know that.
FANSHAW Some feuds in Scotland went on for generations - long after everyone had forgotten the root cause of the conflict.
LEM Yup.
FANSHAW And this area is so isolated, nothing will have changed much for - oh, 200 years. It's like a window into the past.
LEM Speaking of holdin' grudges, Fanshaw, You might not want to say too much - folks round here might still be smartin' from that little dustup with your folks.
FANSHAW My folks?
LEM You know, hunnert-some years back?
FANSHAW Hundred? Oh! Oh, yes. I take your point, Lemuel. Yes. I shall keep mum, then, until we have tested the waters, so to speak, and understand the local population a mite better.
LEM Long as you keep shet, I reckon we'll do fine.
SOUND JUST THE HORSES FOR A MOMENT
SOUND GUNSHOT
ABNER Stop right there!
SOUND HORSES PULL UP
LEM [resigned] Don' want no trouble, podner.
ABNER You one o' them?
LEM Don' even know who them is.
ABNER [hatred oozing] Them Drummonds?
LEM Not no Drummond. Don' know no Drummonds. Jest passin' through. Name's Lemuel Roberts.
ABNER Roberts? You the Deadeye Kid?
LEM [sigh, weary] Used t'be. I's retired.
ABNER But you don't stand with them Drummonds?
LEM I stand pretty much as you see me.
ABNER [thinks a moment] You's s'posed to be mighty good with a shootin' iron - any chance you'd like a job?
LEM I don' take sides.
ABNER It wooden take long. You and me, we cud end this hyear thing once and fer all.
LEM [sigh] I ain't a shootist no more. Fight yer own battles.
SOUND HOOVES, CONTINUING UNTIL STOPPED
FANSHAW [whispered] I say, what if he shoots you in the back?
LEM [snort] Won't make no never mind. He ain't no danger.
FANSHAW [realizing something] Oh! [beat] I'm always surprised that you see things like that so much more clearly than I.
LEM Yep. [dry sarcasm] I'm the lucky one.
MUSIC
AMBIANCE WESTERN TOWN
SOUND ONE SET OF BOOTS ON WOOD
SOUND SALOON DOOR OPENS, BOOTS STOP
AMBIANCE SALOON
PEOPLE [talking, slight lull in conversations]
SOUND BOOTS CONTINUE, DOOR SWINGS SHUT
PEOPLE [Conversation resumes]
FANSHAW [quietly] You certainly know how to make an entrance.
LEM [quietly] Don' see too many strangers hereabouts.
BARKEEP Certainly don't. We're a mite off the beaten path. What'll you have?
LEM Whiskey.
FANSHAW I could do with some myself.
LEM [sighs, then loud, to bartender] I dint see no sign. What's the name of this here town?
BARKEEP Locknaw.
FANSHAW [excited, but still very quiet] I knew it! I'm quite sure there's a castle Lochnaw - I shall have to look that up.
SOUND ONE GLASS BEING SET DOWN AND POURED
BARKEEP Like I said, we don' get many strangers hereabouts. No need fer a sign.
LEM Reckon so. [drinks quickly, reacts] I heerd tell of some feudin' up this way? P'raps why you get no company?
BARKEEP Did that blasted Hap Tarbox try and hold you up? [calling] Sheriff?
LEM No, no - I met someone, but he was might near civil.
FANSHAW You call that civil?
SOUND OFF - CREAK OF CHAIR, FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
LEM They ain't no need fer... You-- you all gotta female sheriff?
FANSHAW I say--!
BARKEEP [hurriedly, under his breath] She's the only one no one--
SOUND FOOTSTEPS STOP
SHERIFF NELL I’m Sheriff Milford, but most folks just call me Sheriff Nell.
LEM Don’ take you very serious, do they?
SHERIFF NELL They don’t have much choice. Is there anything I can help you with?
BARKEEP Tarbox's up to it again.
SHERIFF NELL That’s preposterous. I've got him locked up. What's your name, stranger?
LEM [reluctant, but rapid] Lemuel Roberts. I saw someone--
BARKEEP [belligerently, resents sheriff] Someone tried to stop him in the road and it surely weren't Abner Tarbox.
FANSHAW I say, why?
LEM [trying to calm them] Dint nobody try to stop me. I was just sayin I met someone on the road.
SHERIFF NELL What did he look like?
LEM I dint--
FANSHAW Just under 6 feet tall, ginger hair, perhaps 60 years old, ruddy complexion--
LEM [undertone] tsch. [up] --Dint get a good look at him. He'us in the brush.
BARKEEP That's Hap--
SHERIFF NELL Hush. Let's have a seat.
SOUND FOOTSTEPS
SHERIFF NELL This ...person... did he say anything?
SOUND SQUEAK OF CHAIRS
LEM Ast if I was Tarbox or Drummond. When I said I dint know neither one from Adam, he passed on... on by.
FANSHAW [chuckle]
SHERIFF NELL When was this?
LEM n'hour or so. See here, what's a'goin' on?
FANSHAW Yes, this is perfectly fascinating!
SHERIFF NELL [sigh] Tarbox - Drummond feud. Started long before I arrived in town. They've just about managed to kill each other off. The only ones still fighting are Hap Tarbox and Jake Drummond, and neither one has any children, so Locknaw's just keeping its head down until one or both is done in.
LEM And you're the only one they all--
SHERIFF NELL I was made sheriff because I'm the only one in town with no kin on either side. I came to Locknaw as schoolmarm, if you can believe it.
SHERIFF NELL (continues) Took this on since it was the only way to keep them from shooting up the town every Friday night. Now they just terrorize each other - and strangers.
FANSHAW Perhaps we can help?
LEM I'm not much of one fer interferin'--
SHERIFF NELL That isn't what I've heard, Mister Roberts.
LEM [Sigh]
FANSHAW Your reputation precedes you.
LEM I cain't never get away from it.
FANSHAW [with Nell] Double negative. [chuckles at Nell's reaction]
SHERIFF NELL [with Fanshaw] You shouldn't use a double negative like that. [NOTE she does not react to Fanshaw's comment.]
LEM I don't rightly care.
SHERIFF NELL I’m so sorry. Old habits. I'm-- [sigh] Sorry. If you truly don't want to interfere, I'll--
LEM I dint not say that - neither.
SHERIFF NELL [laughs]
FANSHAW You're smarter than you act sometimes, "podner."
LEM Only, it's more on account of what I used to be, than what I am, if you take my drift.
SHERIFF NELL I'm afraid I don't. Quite.
FANSHAW He's a reformed man. Trying to make up for the things he feels he has done wrong.
LEM Let's just say that if I still were who I was, I'd prob'ly be wantin' money fer this. Being who I am now, I'm just tryin' to -- well, get inta providence's good books.
SHERIFF NELL Expiation.
FANSHAW My precise word.
LEM Naw, just payin' back for my sins.
MUSIC
AMBIANCE WOODS, ONE SET OF FOOTSTEPS IN UNDERBRUSH
FANSHAW Are you sure this is safe?
LEM You don' have to come along. You're sumpin' of a trial.
FANSHAW That's the sort of thanks I get! If it were not for me--
LEM You know I don' mind the comp'ny, I jest meant--
SOUND LOUD SNAP OF TWIG
FANSHAW Was that--?
LEM A twig. We should be jest about there, if'n I reckon right. [grunt] Yep - it's cleared out over thataway.
FANSHAW That will make a delightful change.
SOUND CRUNCHING THROUGH BRUSH, THEN FEET ON DIRT
FANSHAW [low] I say, look there, Lemuel.
LEM [low] I see her. [up, very deferential] Ma'am? Ma'am?
MARILEE [gasps, taken completely by surprise] Oh!
LEM Ma'am, please, we don' mean no--
FANSHAW --any--
LEM --no harm. Jest want to set and talk for a spell. Are you Marilee Tarbox? I was told I might find you hereabouts.
MARILEE [utterly bewildered] I-- I-- What are you doing here?
FANSHAW We've come to speak with you, my dear young lady, about the - ahem - altercation between the Tarbox family and the Drummonds.
MARILEE I'm afeared that'us all my doin'.
LEM That's why we come. Can you bear to tell it?
MARILEE I'us s'posed to marry my removed cousin Abner Tarbox, but I’us took with love for Eb Drummond. So young and fetchin--
FANSHAW How utterly tragic!
MARILEE Ayep! As t'was, I dint make it nowheres. Never did get to church. After-- well, Abner and all brought me back here, and here I's stayed.
FANSHAW And of course, Abner couldn't marry you, after all that had happened--
MARILEE [shocked] That's crazy talk!
LEM Don' pay Fanshaw no mind. He's furren. They talk plumb crazy all the time.
FANSHAW Lemuel!
LEM Miss Marilee, so you's tellin' us that it was you harin' off that started up the feud?
MARILEE S'all I know about. [ashamed] O'course, no one much talks to me no more.
FANSHAW That is most definitely their loss, miss Tarbox. You are as lovely as a veritable posey in springtime.
MARILEE [smiling] Crazy but sweet, aincha just?
MUSIC
SOUND MORE BUSHWHACKING
FANSHAW I don't see what more we need to know - Miss Marilee's abscondance was the root of the conflict.
LEM I jest don't see it. It ain't -- drastic enough, to my mind.
FANSHAW Trust me, it takes very little to set Scottish blood afire, even at this far remove!
SOUND GUN SHOT
FANSHAW Was that--?
LEM Yup. That one WAS. Stay here.
SOUND DROP HEAVY BAG ON HARD GROUND
LEM [Calling] I ain't yer enemy! Whoever y'are, I ain't none o' this! Jest want some palaver.
JAKE Ain't a Tarbox?
LEM Wouldn't even if'n I could.
FANSHAW [off] I'm not even going to try...
LEM [low] Hesh. [up] Can I come on? You see my hands, a'right?
JAKE [beat] All right. Come on, then.
LEM [to Fanshaw] Keep shut. I don't fancy getting' kilt here.
FANSHAW [off, fading] Right-ho, Lem.
SOUND WADING THROUGH UNDERBRUSH
JAKE Who are you, then?
LEM Lemuel Roberts. You can call me Lem.
EB [coming on, wheezy] Looks like a Tarbox t'me.
JAKE Lem. I'm Jake. You holdin' iron?
LEM Left it yonder.
JAKE [grunt of acceptance] So what you come fer?
EB He's scouting fer them.
LEM How bout you'n'I set a spell?
JAKE I reckon we cud do that. Lord'a'mighty, put yer hands down - you look right silly.
LEM Thankee kindly. [grunt as he sits]
EB You cain't trust him, cain't trust none'o them!
JAKE Lemuel Roberts. Seems like I heered that name somewheres.
EB He's the Deadeye Kid! Just goes to show them Tarboxes are yeller enough to hire theyselves a gun!
LEM [grudgingly] Folks sometimes call me... the Deadeye Kid.
JAKE Thassit! [suddenly suspicious] Them Tarboxes, they pay y'all to come on up here?
LEM Nope. [sighs] I-- I don't rightly know why I'm gettin' inta the middle o' this--
EB He's a low-down dirty liar! Check and see if he got him a forked tongue.
LEM Mister Drummond, I reckon the only folks I'm speakin' for here is the town. They ast me to try and stop all this trouble, and here I am. They jest ast me cuz I don't haveta live here, and I-- well, I guess I ain't a‑scared of much. [slight snort]
EB You shud be! My boy here can shoot the eye out a silver eagle at twenny paces!
JAKE [snort of disbelief] Y'all are gonna sort this here out? Cain't think how you spect to do that. This'us been goin' on for a donkey's years, and Hap ain't about to rein in none. He's a curly wolf 'n no mistake. Time and again, I tried to reach some kinder accord with him, but - well, I shore wooden be s'prised to find that boy was plumb rabid.
EB That whole family got polecat in it somewheres. Ain't none of the menfolk right in the head.
LEM But you'ud set down if'n he did?
JAKE [blows out air, thinking, then doubtful] I reckon I cud, but I cain't see my way to trustin' him, nohow. He'd lie soon as look atcha.
EB Don't you go trustin' them Tarboxes, boy!
LEM If I sort this out right, he shou'n't have nothin' left to be afired up about.
JAKE He was borned afired up. Hmm... [beat] Well, [slaps his thighs] Least I can be hospitable. You a drinkin' man?
LEM I wouldn't say no to a snort.
SOUND CREAK OF LEATHER AS JAKE GETS UP
JAKE [going off] Be right back.
SOUND FEET ON GRAVEL WALK AWAY
LEM [waits a second, then] And you, sir?
EB Me? Eh? No one lissens to me!
LEM Might you be Eb Drummond?
EB [sly] I might.... but not to any Tarbox.
LEM Marilee sends her love.
EB [flabbergasted] Marilee? How’d you know Marilee?
LEM Talked to her, jest as I'm talking to you now. Figgered the boy wouldn't understand, so I waited to tell you.
EB She-- Is she--?
LEM I spect she's much as you remember her. They never managed to get her hitched, if that's what you're worrying about.
EB Then ...what happened--?
SOUND FOOTSTEPS ON GRAVEL RETURNING
JAKE Make it myself. Old granddad's receipt.
EB Boy does take after me.
SOUND CREAK AS JAKE SITS
SOUND BOTTLE TOP OFF, POUR INTO TIN CUP
JAKE Get yerself around that, then.
LEM [reacts - powerful, but not bad]
JAKE [chuckles] Kicks, eh?
LEM [coughing slightly] Like a cougar in a carrysack.
EB Yep. Bites and scratches all the way down.
JAKE [chuckles]
EB Boy! Yes you.
LEM [very understated] Hmm?
SOUND OCCASIONAL SIPPING, POUR OF ANOTHER DRINK, THROUGHOUT THE FOLLOWING
EB [whispering throughout] Them Tarboxes, they said Marilee brought me a poke of gold coins, as a dowry-like--
JAKE So you're fixin' to end the feud?
LEM Yep.
EB --and that's what started the intire mess. When they - they ...found her--
JAKE I'd be happier than a pig in swill if this was over.
EB --the coins weren't nowhere. She never had 'em!
JAKE I cud settle down.
EB You b'lieve me, dontcha?
JAKE Maybe raise me up some kids.
LEM Yep. [slight change in emphasis] Sounds mighty nice.
JAKE It's Hap Tarbox won' letcha snap it off.
LEM Reckon I'll ask him hisself.
SOUND CREAK AS HE GETS UP, DUSTS HIS SEAT
LEM Afternoon.
JAKE Here's luck.
EB If you happen across Marilee again, tell her I- I'll come for her.
LEM I'll carry that.
MUSIC
FANSHAW Gold? I was quite certain this all began with love.
LEM Gold moves jest as many mountains.
FANSHAW Yes, but you must consider - Love may very well vanish into thin air, but gold must have actually gone somewhere.
LEM Plenty o' folks, these parts, ‘d bury it. No one'ud ever know.
FANSHAW Oh, come now. A secret is only a secret if no one knows it. Did he say how much gold?
LEM Spect he dint know. Not likely they'd a given no reckonin' to them they's accusin' of rustlin’, no ways.
FANSHAW [sigh] Sometimes I truly despair for your grammar.
LEM [smile] My Grammar's dead. Keeled over when I wasn't but a pup.
FANSHAW [sound of exasperation].
MUSIC
AMBIANCE TOWN
SOUND HOOVES - ONE HORSE
SOUND HORSE STOPS, CREAK OF A DISMOUNT
SOUND BOOTS ACROSS WOODEN PLANKING, KNOCK ON DOOR
SHERIFF NELL [off] Come on in!
FANSHAW This Hap fellow isn't likely to be very cooperative, after his incarceration.
LEM Let me do the talkin'.
SOUND DOOR OPENS, FOOTSTEPS CONTINUE
FANSHAW [muttered] As always...
LEM Sheriff? Ma'am?
SHERIFF NELL Mr. Roberts. Have you had any luck?
LEM A mite. Can I jaw with your prisoner for a spell?
SOUND HEAVY LEATHER CARRYSACK BEING SET DOWN
SHERIFF NELL Hap? Certainly. Though I must warn you he's not very cooperative. Right through here.
SOUND JINGLE OF BIG KEY RING
SOUND LADY'S FOOTSTEPS FOLLOWED BY SINGLE SET OF HEAVY BOOTS
SOUND LOCK UNLOCKS, DOOR OPENS, FOOTSTEPS CONTINUE
FANSHAW [off, calling, slightly disgruntled] I'll just wait out here, shall I?
LEM [muttered] That's jest fine.
SHERIFF NELL Hmm?
SOUND FOOTSTEPS STOP, JINGLE OF KEYS AGAIN
LEM Ah'm startin’ to see what mighta caused all this.
SHERIFF NELL How? I've had Hap and Jake each at one time and another in lockup here, and neither one seems to know - or they simply won’t speak of it.
LEM Ah’m good at listenin' to them as no one else pays any mind to.
SHERIFF NELL Whatever do you mean?
LEM [he said too much] Um, old folks, crazy folks, injuns - them kinds.
SHERIFF NELL [puzzled] Hmm.
LEM If'n it gets the job done, I reckon the path I take don't matter much?
SHERIFF NELL [sigh] Too true. Well, see what sort of a path you can turn up in there - but I'm afraid you'll find it a rather crooked one.
SOUND DOOR OPENS, BOOTED FEET GO IN
HAP Wuzzat?
SHERIFF NELL Someone wishes to speak with you, Mr. Tarbox. Please try and be civil.
HAP You can go to blazes, bezom.
SHERIFF NELL Such a fine upstanding character. I want nothing further to do with him.
SOUND BOOTS SLOW INTO ROOM. DOOR SHUTS.
HAP You can go to blazes too, who’e’er y’be!
LEM Kinda dark in here, ain't it?
HAP It's the pokey, nit.
ABNER Hey! I clapped eyes on you afore this - on the road! You said you wasn't involved!
LEM I ain't involved in none of this, jest trying to help the Sheriff keep the peace. Now, she says Hap - that's you, ain't it? - is one o' them making trouble.
ABNER It's them Drummonds! They's the ones started it, stealin' our gold!
HAP This is all them Drummonds' fault! We're jest tryin' to get back our own!
LEM I unnerstand that. Now if'n I can nose out what y'all lost, get it back to you, would you agree to end this - make peace?
ABNER My own cousin was kilt fer that gold! That varmint Eb Drummond tricked her into stealin’ it, then crevassed her once't he done got hold of it!
HAP [not convincing, too sly] I reckon I might could set down - long as Drummond does.
ABNER Her folks was took hard - losing both daughters in jest one season.
HAP Y'all come back when Drummond turns peacable, ya hear?
LEM [muttering] Two daughters?
HAP What? Wazzat?
LEM [disgusted noise, then strangely inflected] I'll speak with you again soon, feller.
HAP Soon? hah!
MUSIC
AMBIANCE WESTERN TOWN STREET
SOUND ONE PAIR BOOTS ON WOOD OR HARDPACK, WALKING SLOWLY
LEM Didja see him?
FANSHAW Yes. While you were in conference with Tarbox, I took a look around - [heavy sarcasm] as much as I can manage on my own.
LEM And?
FANSHAW Jake Drummond was certainly watching when we left the Sheriff's office. What shall we do now?
LEM I'm sore tempted to break Hap Tarbox out the pokey.
FANSHAW Surely you jest! Lem, that would be madness!
LEM It'd be one way to end everythin'.
FANSHAW Do you mean--?
LEM You put two rabid dogs in one corral, you're bound to have at least one less dog.
FANSHAW But Jake... He seemed like a rather reasonable fellow.
LEM That's all at’s stoppin' me.
SOUND PAPER UNROLLS
FANSHAW What the devil is -- [confused] a wanted poster? [very dry] You're holding it upside down.
LEM Don' matter--
SOUND PAPER IS ROLLED UP
LEM --I jest took it. Wanted sumpin' to make Jake wonder.
MUSIC
SOUND BUSHWHACKING
FANSHAW I don't see why we had to come all the way back out here. You've already spoken with Marilee.
LEM I reckon she might have more t'say about them two lost girls.
FANSHAW Do you feel it's so important?
LEM Everthin's important - right up til you know what ain't. This - well, I reckon its jest sumpin that got overlooked, and I cain't leave a loose rope to dangle.
FANSHAW Colorful. Do you still hear Jake behind us?
LEM Reckon I do.
SOUND LEAVE THE BRUSH, BOOTS ON HARD PACK
FANSHAW Aha, the lady is expecting us.
MARILEE [coming on] Y'all came back!
FANSHAW Of course! Simply to gaze upon you would brighten any man's day.
MARILEE [giggles]
LEM [disgusted] Now that the courtin's done with, you two want a hayloft somewheres?
FANSHAW I say!
LEM You say plenty. Miss Marilee, we come back fer two reasons. First, Tarbox said sumpin about two girls died the year the feud started--
MARILEE My sister might could tell you more--
JAKE [off] What in tarnation is wrong with you, Kid?
LEM [calling back off to Jake] This'll only take a moment. You might want to--
EB [off] Marilee?
MARILEE [breathless] Eb?
FANSHAW Now I see your scheme! You romantic fool, you!
LEM [calling] Jake, I need to apologize fer leadin' you all to hell and gone--
[BEHIND JAKE AND LEM, MARILEE AND EB EXCHANGE ENDEARMENTS - HE STARTS TO SOUND YOUNGER, LESS CROTCHETY]
JAKE I should say so! What you want with in a place like this? [slightly weirded out - it is a graveyard] They ain't nothin' here.
LEM I been thinkin' that mebbe the answer is here somewheres.
JAKE Here? Buried? Was that paper Tarbox gave you a map?
LEM No map. See, two young ladies - were taken from their family, right about the start of all this, here. I'm reasonable sure Marilee weren't the cause, so I have to ast myself, what about the other one?
MARILEE Jenfaire? What do you know about her?
LEM Sheriff Nell says your sister left behind a child and a husband who weren't much more than a drunk and a troublemaker--
EB That's a Tarbox all right. Beggin’ your pardon, my dearest dove.
MARILEE He'us a beast. He hurt her so bad when he got too much white lightnin inta him.
LEM So I ast myself who would need the money more, if'n she were plannin' on lightin' out fer parts unknown - a newborned mama, or a girl gone to marry?
JAKE But Jenfaire Tarbox, she was Hap's Grandma.
LEM So Sheriff Nell said.
JAKE She never dint go nowheres.
LEM Not like she planned, no.
HAP [off] Hold it right thar! Hands up, both of you!
LEM Down!
JAKE No!
SOUND SCUFFLE, THEN GUNSHOTS [from off] WHICH PING OFF OF STONE.
JAKE I reckon there's one good thing about meetin in a place like this. [grunt as he rolls up to shoot]
SOUND CLOSE GUN SHOT
JAKE Plenty o’ cover.
LEM Dammit, I'm trying to end this peaceable.
JAKE Go out there and tell that sidewinder, then. I'll put up when he does.
FANSHAW Lem, he's behind a tree north-north east of here. If you roll to the left, he won't have a clear shot.
LEM Right. Jake, you stay put. Gimme some cover, but don't waste yer lead.
JAKE [almost enjoying this] Oh, I got plenty.
LEM Just cover!
SOUND SCUFFLE AS LEM ROLLS AWAY. A COUPLE QUICK GUN SHOTS FROM OFF, ONE FROM NEAR - THEY GO ON SPORADICALLY IN THE B/G
LEM Get Marilee over here. I need Jenfaire.
FANSHAW Right ho!
LEM [yelling] Abner? Abner Tarbox!
HAP It's Hap, you chicken-brained dog-breath varmint!
JAKE [hissing] Course, it's Hap! Abner got hung last month over to Conners Gulch.
LEM [muttered] Dammit.
FANSHAW Here is Marilee. Shall go and I fetch Abner for you, as well?
LEM [sigh] Yeah. If’n you please.
MARILEE Jenfaire don' wanna come. She ain't fit for comp’ny.
LEM I ain't company, woman. Think o' me as the law.
EB [sounding much younger] Yes, darlin’, lissen to the--
ABNER [off, coming on] Let go of me - you city slickin' furriner!
EB What the blazes!
ABNER [grunt of effort] Hah! [shocked] Marilee!
MARILEE Abner!
EB Stay behind me, Marilee.
SOUND GUN SHOTS CONTINUE
ABNER You little mink, runnin' off on me.
EB You dint take no time a'tall to fetch you another bride, Abner Tarbox.
ABNER [sarcasm] Right. I plumb fergot it were almost five years afore you finally hitched up with Ellie Dean.
MARILEE Oh!
EB I had to, darlin'--
LEM I hate to break up this li'l tea party--
SOUND GUNSHOT
LEM But if'n we don't sort things out right quick, your 'last remainin' will be joinin' you.
JAKE [off] You say sumpin, Lem?
LEM [calling] Talkin' to m'self. [quieter, urgent] Get Jenfaire.
MARILEE [going off] I'll try...
ABNER [low] Eb, Don't you never tell that purty little girl this, but I was jest as happy to see the back of her.
EB What? Why?
ABNER I's never sure but that we was a mite too close fer kissin, if’n you see where I's aimin'.
EB Oh!
LEM Sounds t'me like, if the gold's found, this whole thing can be done with.
MARILEE Jenfaire’s here. Talk.
LEM Jenfaire? Where?
FANSHAW She prefers to stay out of sight, Lemuel, but she will answer.
LEM [Sigh] I’ud rather look folks in the face, but-- Jenfaire Tarbox, wha'd you do with them gold coins?
JENFAIRE [distant, wispy, teary] I-- I hid ‘em under the cowshed, in a leather poke. I meant to go back and..., and git. Just git away-- but the baby come early.
LEM I see.
JENFAIRE --and I-- I dint make it.
LEM Thank you ma'am, fer that. You go on back now. I'll try and turn this stampede.
EB Can I-- I can stay here, with Marilee, cain't I?
LEM Reckon I don't know, but you can try. [Up] Hap! I know where the gold is. I'm standin' up, and if you shoot me, there ain't no one else alive can tell you where to find it.
FANSHAW Must you rub it in?
SOUND NOISE OF STANDING: CREAK OF LEATHER, PULLING SELF UP ON HEADSTONE, ETC.
HAP [off, calling] Tell Jake to throw down his weapon.
JAKE Ain't gonna happen!
HAP Tell him--
LEM Ain't gonna happen, Hap. But Jake is gonna walk away, and you and I are gonna go on and get yer coins.
JAKE [whispered, still hunkered down] I ain't!
LEM Jest go.
SOUND [beat, then] JAKE STANDS, FOOTSTEPS ON GRAVEL
MUSIC BUILDS NOT A CHANGE SCENE, JUST A DRAMATIC MOMENT
SOUND CLICK OF HAMMER ON REVOLVER
SOUND GUNSHOT, SOMEWHAT IN SLOW-MO
SOUND SECOND GUNSHOT - GOES WILD, RICOCHET.
JAKE [yell of surprise]
HAP [off] Unggh! [impact]
FANSHAW Oh, good shot.
JAKE [turning around/coming on] What in tarnation?!
SOUND BODY DROP, OFF
HAP [off, death rattle]
LEM [under his breath] Damn.
MUSIC
SOUND HIS AND HERS BOOTS ON WOODEN PLANKS
SHERIFF NELL So Mr. Roberts shot Hap?
JAKE The critter was fixin' to shoot me in the back! He couldn't not do it. [beat] Ma’am.
SHERIFF NELL Did anyone else witness this?
JAKE Nope. I'm plumb sorry miss, I mean sheriff, ma’am, but it was jest the three of us. [beat] And all them headstones.
SOUND BOOTS STOP. DOOR OPENS SLOWLY, WITH EFFORT
SHERIFF NELL Ungh - what is -- wrong --?
JAKE Let me help ya, miss. Ungh --
SOUND DOOR OPENS GRUDGINGLY, SOMETHING FABRIC IS BEHIND IT
SOUND MUFFLED CLINK
SHERIFF NELL A rotted old leather sack?
MUSIC
SOUND TWO HORSES HOOVES
FANSHAW You could have kept some.
LEM [down] Sheriff Nell there will see it gets put to good use - mebbe fer a church or a school or sumpin.
FANSHAW You did the right thing. That town is free of a terrible burden.
LEM [down] My hands done it. Dint give me no time to think twice.
FANSHAW If not for your interference, Lemuel, a good man - Jake - would be dead. [beat] Try to think of it this way - you ended the feud with but a single shot.
LEM [starting out of slump] Yeah, I reckon a single shot kin have some kind of power.
FANSHAW Yes.
LEM [kidding, sly] Like that shot heard round the world? Jest over a hunnert years ago?
FANSHAW [huffy] Yes, well.
LEM [chuckles a bit]
MUSIC OUT
CLOSER
NOTE: Poem with the line shot heard round the world was written in 1837.